In those 37 days I have
- cried more tears than I thought my body was capable of.
- prayed more pathetic prayers.
- avoided baby sections like the plague.
- hardly gone in the room where all of Maggie's clothes are still hanging.
- realized how many women have lost their precious children. Too many.
- gotten way too many doctor and hospital bills.
- thought about how my life would b different if her little heart were still beating.
- thought about what it would have been like to go through labor with a breathing, living, squirmy baby left in my arms.
- wondered a gajillion times what she would have looked like and sounded like.
- wondered a gajillion more times what she is doing with herself these days.
- wondered a trazillion times if she misses me as much as I miss her.
- wondered if Maggie will ever be a big sister.
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