Thursday, March 1, 2012

Answers

We finally got some answers about Nugget yesterday.
Dave and I were concerned that there was something wrong.
Something big.
Like genetic disorders that cannot be fixed.
Or something that we wouldn't be able to do anything about.

So, we met with Dr. Grainger to go over the tests they ran on Nugget's tissues.
And, without holding you in much suspense,
we got GOOD NEWS.
He showed us the papers and I had no.freaking.idea what the words on the paper meant.
But, thankfully, I am not super shy and I asked about 500 questions
so that he could explain what in the world he was talking about.

Basically what happened is that it was a fluke.
(And, as one of my friends at work said today,
Dave and I just have shitty ass luck.
True statement.)

Nugget had triploidy, which is one of the most common genetic causes of miscarriages.  Triploidy occurs when a fetus has 69 chromosomes instead of the usual 46.  It is caused by either the sperm or the egg bringing a full 46 chromosomes instead of the 23 that each of them are supposed to bring to the marriage of babyness.

Triploidy is incompatible with life and the majority of fetuses that have triploidy miscarry early and don't make it past 20 weeks gestation.  I think the longest a child has lived is 10 months after birth.  Any child with triploidy will not survive and it's just a matter of time.

Triploidy is not something that D or I have or carry--it was just a fluke and our chances of conceiving another child with it are slim.  It can happen to anyone and it isn't anything that we did or didn't do or had or didn't have that caused it.  It isn't something that they could have "cured" if we would have known about it.

Good news.
Wonderful news.
Many prayers of thanks were sent up after hearing this.
And, although I am still grieving and figuring out life now,
I am thankful.
Thankful that it happened sooner instead of later.
And that my body did what it was supposed to do even though, at the time, it seemed like it failed me.

Looking in the future...
the pregnancy test that they took at the appointment came back with my hcg level still at 15.
I was annoyed since I wanted to get the ball rolling.
And since it's still at 15, I just have to wait.
But, i will work on my patience.
I go back in a week to take another pregnancy test.
If my levels are where the should be, then we will get this whole cluster-of-craziness started again
(using the same approaches as last time- femara, gonal-f, ovidrel, iui for those of who that know and/or care).
Since it worked, we'll do the same thing.
In the meantime, Dr. Grainger is also going to test some other things just to make sure levels of some other things are normal.

So.
Yay.
I am relieved.
And thankful.
Isn't that weird?
But, it could have been so much worse.
I am lucky.

And, guess what else?
We found out Nugget was a boy.
Now I have a daughter and a son.
He's a he now.
Not an it.
I struggled with that last night for a long time.
I thought I would want to know.
But, now that I know that It was a He.
It makes it difficult to swallow-
again.
And, I've tried to think of names that are close to Nugget
(like how we picked Maggie's name) 
but there aren't any.
He may just be known as Nugget forever.




5 comments:

  1. I'm glad for good news for you, friend. And I smiled when I read that Nugget was a boy. I'm sure that Maggie and Isaac are taking good care of him.

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  2. That is good news. I am glad that at least it was something random. I am happy to hear you have a son now, even though it beaks your heart (and mine).
    Thinking of you.

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  3. I'm glad you got some answers, and am so happy to hear it was just a fluke that will, hopefully, not happen again. And how bittersweet to know you have a little boy. I'm sure Maggie is taking great care of him.

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  4. Very happy about your news! This is very similar to a friend of mine - still-birth for her first-born precious daughter, and a chromosome "fluke" with her second. She now has very healthy and happy four year old twins!

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