Sunday, February 12, 2012

10 for the week

1.  On the drive to work

I saw an amazing thing.  
I think it was Wednesday morning.
There were two hawks sitting next to each other in a tree.
Facing me as I drove.
Sure, it could have been a coincidence.
But, I'm pretty sure that it was God's way of showing me that
Maggie is showing the new one a bit of the ropes.
That makes me so happy.
And sad.
All at the same time.

2.  My Saturday

I spent my entire Saturday cleaning with my mom and dad.
We started at nine.  I sat down at 7:30 or so that night.
I did 9 loads of laundry.
Every inch of carpet of our house has been vacuumed.
Every piece of wood (or whatever) has been dusted.
The fridge has been deskunked.
The stove has been scrubbed.
All sinks, tubs, and toilets have been sanitized.
Piles of whatever have been sorted through and organized.
And our recycling bin is overflowing.
I feel cleansed.
It is a great feeling.
Please don't think that the house was incredibly nasty and horder-like before.
It's just that being pregnant does not give you a lot of energy.
Then, having a D&C doesn't improve the situation.

3. Backsplash

It is mostly done.
We need to touch up a few areas of grout
and seal it.
But everything else is done.
I am impressed with the Mr.
I married myself a good man.
He knows his way around home/car/farm improvement projects.
And, I do love how it turned out.

This was our kitchen when we moved in.
The drawers didn't close, the cupboards didn't close.  I hated it.
Two summers ago we put in new cabinets and counters.  Before:
Such an improvement...but kind of bland.
Then, we started getting ready to put up the backsplash.
The timing may have not been the best.
Evening of D&C
A mixture of stone and glass tiles.
My two favorite men.

I love it.
And now the kitchen is only missing
new floors,
pendant lights over the peninsula,
and me being barefoot and pregnant in it.

4.  Flowers
I received some beautiful flowers this past Friday and Saturday.
My sister and her kids sent us some.

And D's parents, my wonderful in-laws, sent us these beauties as well.
They have made our house so much happier.
Thank you.

5. Dessert
Last Wednesday, after I had found out nugget didn't have a heartbeat, I stopped by my mom and dad's house after work.
I was lucky enough to run into a wonderful woman.  
She is the mom of a past student
and a wonderful baker/chef/woman/mom/coffee maker too.
She made a delicious...I mean fantastic Cherry Cobbler.
Now, I'm a huge fan of any cobbler/crisp because of the crunchy topping.
But, folks.
This took it to the next level.
It was amazing.
I'm pretty sure she used a special kind of almond (that I read about on her blog)
because that crunchy topping was the best I've ever had.
Thank you, B.R.
So thoughtful of you to drop off dessert.
And, I have your pan.
I will maybe have to come to the Perk every morning this week
so that I can drop it off. :)

6.  Panic
I panicked a bit yesterday.
I took a break from cleaning to make my students' Valentine's.
Instead of giving them another piece of candy,
I am giving them glow sticks.
I was attaching the glow sticks to the hearts
and I bent over to get my scissors.
My abs of steel must have bent some of the glow sticks
because they started glowing.
I put them off to the side to throw away
but Fergs got ahold of them.
The next minute there was orange spit dripping out of her mouth.
It was all over her mouth and paws.
She started foaming at the mouth and acting like she was going to puke.
I tried to wipe off all the extra
and I tried forcing her head into the water bowl
but she just ran off to hide.
She seems fine today.
Now we are just watching for a glowing litter box.

7. Nugget

  • Dave referred to Nugget as "Ted Nugent."I just googed him to see what he looked like.  I'm not impressed.
  • While cleaning yesterday I made another stack of cards and notes and gifts that we received in the last week or two.  Dave asked if I am adding them to Maggie's stuff or if I am starting a new drawer.  I had just been planning on adding it to Mag's stuff.  He thought I should start a new drawer.  I told him I didn't want to run out of drawers- I only had 8 of them.  He said we could get another dresser if we needed to.  Dude, we better not need all 8 of them. And we sure as heck better not need another dresser.  
  • I wish I would have known if Nugget was a boy or a girl.  I don't like referring to it as an it.
  • And, now that I'm not pregnant, September doesn't seem that long away.
  • Because of Nugget, I have decided that I am going to talk to a professional head shrink.  Not because I feel like I am psycho. I just want to talk to somebody.  And, there are a few things I want to work out for if there is a next time:
    • The whole God question- God's involvement/uninvolvement in these experiences--why?
    • My bitterness towards God, women, pregnancy, fertility, etc.
    • My fear of having another being die within my care.
    • Grieving the loss of two children while caring for and being excited about a new pregnancy/child (not feeling like I have to forget the first two to bond with and appreciate the third).
8.  In the mail
I received a huge box in the mail a few days ago.  A long-time family friend is an amazing potter.
She sent Dave and an incredibly beautiful vase that she made.
But, that's just the beginning.
Not only did she make it,
but she wrote the blessing from the Sister Care Seminar that I spoke at in November.
I absolutely love that blessing- I think it says so much.
Each side of the vase has a part of the blessing.
"May God bless you with healing for wounds from the past and all that breaks your heart today.  May your tears be transformed into live-giving compassion and love for others. Go now with the assurance that you are beloved and called to be a living blessing to others.  Amen."

(We're not done, folks.)
Then, she typed a ton of Bible verses, cut them apart, and put them inside the vase.

I have read each of them (so has Fergie) and plan to reread them when I am feeling one of those moments of suckiness come on.
Words cannot express how incredibly thoughtful you are, EB.
Thank you.
This is something that I will treasure forever and will, for sure, make sure to pass the story onto my *fingers crossed* children.
I wish there were words more than "Thank you" that could express to you my gratitude.

9. From 1984
And, just as a remembrance.
This is me as the flower girl in the above potter's wedding.
I LOVED that dress.
I'm just sorry you can't see my white gloves.

10.  Currently Reading
I'm only a few chapters in and I already love it.
(Everything is Illuminated is another good book of his.)
Waiting to see the movie until I have read the book, though.
I will watch it at home.
So I don't have to sob in public.
I've done that enough in the last year.


  1. Love the backsplash!!! Looks great! And... love the two hawks. Makes my heart happy.

    You WILL NOT need all 8 drawers. Some day you will have a rainbow baby in your arms, and it will be the luckiest baby ever to have you as a mom (and some pretty amazing older sibs too).

    LOL @ the glowing litter box.

    Love the vase - what a thoughtful gift!

  2. I just found your blog from your story on Faces of Loss, Faces of Hope. I just wanted to say that I am so sorry for your losses. I don't know your specific pain, but I've had 3 miscarriages, so I can understand at least a little bit of the heartache that you feel.
    My prayers are with you.


  3. I actually found your blog when looking for inspirational verses to encourage a friend! --but I'm amazed, and can't believe in mere coincidences:

    My husband and I went through the hell of infertility (and as they say, "When you're walking through hell, keep walking!"), and the loss of our firstborn son (shortly before our 9th anniversary, to give you an idea of timing); right now, we're rejoicing in an unexpected pregnancy later in life (what would actually be my 6th child), but our loss and our struggle is never far from mind.

    I hate it when people say, "See, you stopped trying and look what happened!" --when they see my two healthy sons, because most just don't know what brought us to this point... But, I want to be an encouragement to you!

    It is impossible to say to you now, but as someone who can look back now with love: it *does* get easier (though it never goes away), and you will love your child and appreciate your life *that much more* when the blessings come.

    Love and hugs.
    Mom to ^Jonathan^ (God's gift-- lived 3 days), Joshua (God saves), Jaydan ("God has heard")


Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...