Sunday, October 16, 2011

October 15

The past week has been harder than normal.
Maybe it was because there have been so reminders.
Of what should have been.
And what isn't.
For me.
And for so many other families.

I knew October would be a hard month.
This was the month that Maggie joined our family.
But, on top of that, October is the month to remember our children.
Lost through miscarriage
or stillbirth
or ectopic pregnancies
or infant death.

Just in the U.S.,
2,000 women lose a baby every day.
That's 730,000 a year.
And, those are the ones that are reported.
That doesn't include those that people don't talk about.
Or the ones in the other 190+ countries in the world.
If we did, there would be more than
138,000,000 babies lost each year.

And, for some reason, this still isn't an urgent matter.
The medical field still cannot find explanations for 50% of these deaths.
So, 69,350,000 babies die in one year
for no. reason. at. all.
We have no explanation for why they died.
And, still, nothing is done.
It is still not really talked about.
You don't see anything in the news.
And we still, in 2011,
cannot give families answers about
why their child died?

I'll get off my soapbox now.
I was saying that this month has been hard.
And my coworkers knew that.

They knew that I would be struggling a bit more.
And they didn't ignore it.

And think that if they didn't mention it, i wouldn't have to think of it.
Instead, they acknowledged how much
this sucks sometimes.
And, I was reminded that it's not everyday that you work with people who are so
and gracious
and supportive.
Thank you.

And finally, October 15.

A day to remember.
We lit a candle to remember Maggie.

And we lit 6 more.

For Nancy and her daughter, Violet.
Who has been gone for only 6 days.

For Jennie and her son, Owen.

For Heather and her son, Isaac.

For my cousins and their sweet babies.

For the Kings and their babies.

The sixth was for others- whom I will not name for privacy.
But you know who you are.
I lit a candle for you and your babies.

I prayed that we will find peace 
as we continue through this journey.

Fergie even helped.

And, I didn't want to blow them out.
It felt like another goodbye.
Even though it's not.

From this website. Love her stuff!

1 comment:

  1. I agree that October has been hard.

    How sweet of your co-workers to send flowers!

    And, thank you again for lighting a candle for Isaac.


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