Weekend.

Dave brought home a surprise for me.
Unfortunately, I didn't get to keep it.

Seriously?
A one day old Persian kitten.
Born premature.
Holy.cuteness.in.a.mammal batman.
Adorable.
The owner was going to name it Gracie.
We got to bottle feed and tube feed it over the weekend.

How does a cute little guy like that end up as fatty as Fergie?

Gracie the kitten even got to go to the Pretty Prairie Bullmania Rodeo with us.
She was in a cooler with hot water bottles to keep her warm.
We fed her at half time.  Or intermission.  What do you call that time in a rodeo?

The rodeo was completely entertaining.
Especially the mutton bustin'.

Source

I laughed hysterically the entire time.
Those poor little kids hang on for dear life and those sheep go flying.
Who knew sheep could run that freaking fast?

Another special part of the rodeo?
There were lots of "unique" types of people there.
(My mother has always said, "It takes all kinds.")
I saw lots of mullets and rat tails.
Sorry, folks. I tried to get pictures but I was not quite sneaky enough.
I was, however, intrigued by this outfit choice.

That's quite a clever use of a hairband.  
Pretty 100% sure my mother would not have let me walk out of the door with this wardrobe on.
Fantastic.
Stay classy, Kansas.

In other news?

• It's still hot as Hades here. Recess duty can kiss my rear.  
• A lady named "Ms. N. Garcia" commented on my blog yesterday.  I am hoping that it's Nina Garcia from Project Runway. I do love me some Heidi Klum and ridiculous clothings. Maybe Nina will read this and see the above picture and think that using hair ties to try to hide your undergarments is a really clever and attractive thing to do.  If it's you, Nina, text me!  We'll go get coffee.  And, if you aren't Nina Garcia, I'll still get coffee with you (but you can't be creepy or weird).
• And, if it's not too much to ask, can you add a cousin of mine to your prayer list?  She just had a little boy about 2 weeks ago (he was due about a month after Magster).  She had a sudden stroke and has been hospitalized, leaving her husband caring for their 3 sons.  You can visit her Caring Bridge site here.  I cannot imagine the fear and helplessness that the entire family feels. Thanks, friends.

Squeezes and hugs until next time when I introduce you to some new friends and some cures for the heat (just a fancy way of saying that I have some pictures from summer that I haven't posted yet).

Oh, and happy 100th post my friends!

100 more to come.

At some point I am going to start posting more than once a week again.  Stupid job gets in the way of so many things!  Like weekends and freetime and sleeping in. Seriously.  (Today is the first day in several weeks that I haven't been at school).

I had a plan for what I was going to post today.  Things such as adorable little one day old kitties and cute kids riding sheep.  And the shocking things you may see at a Kansas Bullmania Rodeo.  Unfortunately, the computer I'm on doesn't have a place for me to put my camera card.  And I'm too lazy to go find a cord.

So, all that cuteness and trashiness is going to have to wait until tomorrow.
The anticipation will help your Monday go quickly, right?

My next post, folks, will be my 100th post!
Can you believe it?
100 posts about my dear Maggie and our 6 months together.
100 posts about my stupid organs.
And other ramblings that, for some reason, I feel the need to share.
And you, my dear friends, read diligently.

My prayer for the next 100 posts? That I will be able to share (in no order of importance):

• There is a riding mower parked somewhere on our property.  And I use it while sipping on beverages.  And, we'll actually have a green lawn to use it on.
• Our kitty will have lost some weight.  She is Fergie McFatterson right now. 
• I hear another sweet heartbeat.
• And that magical heartbeat hasn't stopped beating.
• And that it will keep going, even after 24 weeks of pregnancy. 
• And I will be able to keep out all of the sweet baby stuff that we bought. Instead of hiding it away.
• And the reasons that my pants don't fit has nothing to do with me not being motivated to get my rear to the gym. (Getting kind of sick of doing squats every morning so that my pants stretch.  Ladies, you know what I'm talking about, right?  If you don't, I kind of hate you. :) ).
• I have a Coke fountain in my house because
• Coke has been found to be really good for you.  Therefore, I no longer have to limit how much I drink it.
• It is now socially acceptable to wear sweatpants and T-shirts to work everyday.  Or, at least, that my school now requires its teachers to wear scrubs to work.
• I continue to heal and feel patience and peace.  With or without any Harder Magic.
• And, for Dave and his brother--that the Vikings do better than they did last year.  They still haven't gotten over their season from 2 years ago when the Vikes were oh-so-close.
• Finally- that the other women whom I know who have lost a sweet child or are slowly giving up on a dream of ever having a child, that they will feel peace and true happiness- with or without their own Magic.  No names mentioned but you know who you are and I think and pray for you all daily.

I'm back

I'm praying the craziness of the beginning of the school year is done.

And by crazy I mean cra-zy. Insane.
Insane in the membrane.

Our class sizes were huge (huge for po-dunk town Kansas) so after the first few days of school they hired an angel to decrease our class sizes.

I spent the weekend organizing my life and trying to help the wonderful new teacher as much as possible without being that lady is who is just really annoying and not really helpful at all.

So, now that that craziness is over, I am hoping that life calms down a bit.

But, because of all of that I have not blogged at all.
And, therefore, I have a ton of crap to write about.
And, believe me, it is balls-to-the-walls ex.ci.ting.
I'm not pregnant.
So, it's not that exciting but you take what you can get 'round these parts.

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First of all, I had a follow up with the doctor to get some things taken care of.
Good news.  Things look good and the surgery seemed to have fixed the crazinessinmyuterus that he was trying to fix.
Awesome.
Never did I think I would celebrate about this.

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In case I haven't mentioned in before, my sister is great.
If you have forgotten, I've mentioned it here and here and here.
The flowers she sent at work:

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A past coworker from Mini-Soda went ahead and sent me the most hilarious package ever.

Because she is possibly one of the funniest people I have ever met.

Every story she told made piddle in my briefs just-a-bit.

Dave was wondering WTH as I was showing him what was the box she sent me.
He did not think it was as awesome as I did.
He was confusing.
(Carrie, I hope you are laughing at that up there.
So, I had this student who instead of saying "I am confused" she said, "I am confusing."
It was funnier when you were there. Swearsies.)

Each item in the box had special meaning.
And, I could take the time to explain each one.
But it would probably sound dumb to everyone else.
And then you would realize how easily amused I am.

Just know that I like my sodas cold and I love Bennigan's and the Turkey Toms.
Kansas does not believe in heavenly-goodness-in-a-pretzel-bun for some reason.
And Maggie will have a wind-chime to keep her company.
This friend gave me a wind chime when I moved from Mini-soda to Kans-ass.
It is hanging on our front porch
And whenever I hear it blow (which is 354 days a year), I think of her.
So, I think her a lot.  But not in a Creeper McCreeperson sort of way.

She and I swore we were going to exercise everyday after school.

And we did it once.

FAIL.

I'm guessing we left and got Turkey Toms and pomegranate martinis.

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Then my friend (the small version of me) from college sent me a package.

I thought if was going to be a box filled with nuts, seeds, sprouts, and a fat mattress.
She is such a little squirrel.

Instead, I got this beautiful figurine.

Isn't it amazing?

It is called "Family Love" and I love it and its simplicity.

She also sent along some stones with the words "Peace" "Hope" and "Strength" engraved in them.

I think she knows I am a huge fan of hers.

And I love her dearly.

Spanks, Rach.

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And, if you wondered where my sister got her thoughtfulness? 

It was from my mom.

This was her gift for me tonight after work.

Dinner.

Amazingly delicious dinner.

Homemade garlic bread!

Spaghetti!

Homemade marinara and pesto!

And homemade peach cobler (with a splash of Grand Marnier in it).

I picked dinner up after school.
It was so good.

This is why I moved to Kansas, folks.
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There are now 3 riding mowers for sale on the way from home to work.
I think it's a sign.

It's divine intervention.

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And I think this is hilarious.
And a bit creepy, too.

First Day of School

Today was my first day of school with kids.

It went well--really well.

I'm exhausted.

And my feet hurt.

But, it was a great. 

And, do you know what topped it off?

My sister.

She sent me flowers for the first day of school.
!!!!!!

She is the sweetest. Ever.

And I don't think she knows how much I love her and appreciate her and admire her.

Because, truthfully, I am not always the best texter or caller or emailer.
(I forget or get distracted by something at home--like a huge container of spaghetti sauce that I dropped all over the entire floor, cupboards, stove, and carpet. Shut the front door--that was not awesome in my day.  This was after I got home at 7 after speeding to WalMart to pick up some school supplies that kids didn't bring to school).

But, I hope you all know how lucky I am.
That she is so thoughtful.
And kind.
And strong.

And, as a perfect example of how crazy today was and how forgetful I was today--
I didn't get a picture of the flowers.
I left them at school.
Along with the flowers, I left my camera.
And, sitting amidst the flowers and my camera, is my entire pouch of make-up.
Sitting on my counter at school.
(I will need to bust a move to school and sneak in so that I can get my face on before the kids come.)

So, just so you know.

She's great.
And I'm lucky.
And you should be jealous.

10 Step Surgery

So, things went well in the surgery room with Dr. Grainger, my reproductive organs, and I.

There's not very much to say, as I don't really remember most of it.

I do remember, however, that the drugs were great.

10 things I remember:

1. Dave and my parents got to drink free coffee and I didn't.   

2. When the nurse put in my iv, my blood squirted everywhere.  It went all over my sheets, my hand and arms, and her pants.  

3.  I got some sweet, free booties to wear on my feet.  And, I got to take them home.

Make sure to notice my crooked glasses from 2003. And, of course, no picture is complete without my double quadruple chin.

4.  They hooked me up to some monitors.  And then I eavesdropped on the guy in the cubby-hole next to me.  He was old.

5. Dave entertained me.

6.  Dr. Grainger made sure he looked like a dork.

7.  I did too. I am H-O-T.

8.  A couple of hours later, I went home.  Completely out of it. It was fantastic.

9.  Everything went smoothly--I even got some pictures for my scrapbook.

10.  Then this girl got some Jimmy John's (swoon, swoon) for dinner.

 I go in at the end of this week to get a few things taken care of. 

I'm feeling really, really good.  Not even half as sore I was last year when I had this done. I am moving around pretty easily (Don't tell Dave, though.  I like having a servant-man-slave).

I'll be ready for kiddos on Tuesday for sure.

Thanks for your prayers--they did wonders for me and my organs. :)

Highs and Lows of the first day of school.

Today was my first official day back at work.
Great to see my wonderful coworkers again.
I have missed them - even if they laugh when I trip while walking.  Giving a side-eye to my teammate whom shall remain nameless.  L.e.e.

There were some high points and low points of the day.

Highs:

• Got to spend time with my long-lost teacher friends.  They get me.  And I love that.
• I laughed a lot.  Because my teammates are hilarious.  And full of vinegar.
• Free lunch, thank you.
• I choked up to cry about 3 or 4 times.  I didn't though.  I'm glad too- because I was sporting my version of my Sephora make-over and I'm glad I didn't ruin all that hard work.  (New things are hard--whenever I see people for the first time, do something for the first time after all of this has happened, I struggle.  After the "firsts" are done, I am good.  There's just something about new things that just make the tears come.)
• A wonderful, thoughtful, amazing mother of a past student dropped off a gift in my room.  She knows how much I love our local coffee shop.  She also knows I need to eat more of her delicious snickerdoodle cookies.  And she knows how much I love to go to Target. And she knows that her son is an amazing boy and he possibly could be a favorite.  Thank you, Beth.  Your gifts are great.  But, your thoughtfulness is even greater.  There's a reason your son is the way he is.  Good kids with good hearts don't just happen.

Perfect for Vikings football season.

My dinner.

Lows:

• Praying that the wireless and the projectors for our computers work on the first day of school. It didn't work today.  It's not looking promising and that makes me a bit nervous since I wanted to use all that on the first day.  But, I am not complaining.  We have a great tech guy who works really, really hard and is doing the best he can.  And his kid is super cute and smiley, too. I'm hoping he reads this. And knows that I am kissing up, but am sincere too. 
• We had to go through and talk about the highlight of the summer.  Barf.  
• What I wanted to say, "My wonderful daughter was born.  She is a month old and the most precious thing I've ever seen.  She isn't really sleeping and she cries in the middle of the night and she has disgusting diapers.  But, she is healthy and perfect and the answer to our prayers. And I love her with all my heart."  
• What I could have said, "My summer sucked a**.  Instead of meeting and hugging my daughter, I tried to keep myself busy so that I wouldn't think about the fact that she was taken from us way too early.  I tried to ignore all of the babies being born and, instead, I started going back to the fertility clinic where they told me I have a defective body and I need to get it fixed with surgery.  And I visited my daughter's grave. She was the answer to my prayers. And I still love her with all my heart even if I never got to hug her while she was still living."
• Instead, I said, "I spend a lot of time with family--my wonderful sister and her kids visited and we had a family reunion." Awesome.  That's beauty-pageant-interview-question-answer-quality right there.  Watch out, Miss Teen USA 2007.  I'm on your tail for mind-shattering answers.

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And, at some point I want to update you on Cooper and his parents.  Remember him?  He is the fattiest, cutiest baby now.  He is a ball of cuteness and chubbers and rolls.  And,  he is going to be the total package as soon as he can swagger around to the ladies.  Also, if he gets 1/2 of the thoughtfulness, niceness, wonderful genes that his parents have, he'll be a catch.  Seriously, folks...there aren't too many people in the world as wonderful as his 'rents.  They just seem to know when I need a pick-me-up and I feel so incredibly blessed to have friends like them.   They fill my heart with good things.

Signing off,

Loopy Waffle Buns

(We teachers are easily amused. Go to this site to find out how you can figure out your Captain Underpants name!).

Surgery

Scheduled for this Friday at 12:00 (school starts the following Tuesday- just in the nick of time!).

Whoop, whoop!

I have a pre-surgery appointment with awesome Dr. Grainger on Tuesday.

Strangely enough, I can't wait!

The waiting since June has been hard.

So glad we can get the ball rolling!

August

I always forget how busy this time of year is.

You would think that it would get easier after 9 years.

But every year I spend too much time at school.

And I buy too many supplies that I already have but buy them anyways because they are so nicely packaged.

But, I do love the school supplies.

Maybe a little too much.

This was only the first load.

Eeek.

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Also, some of you have mentioned how disappointed you are that I didn't get my riding mower (with cup holder) this year.

Don't worry.

I'm not mad.  Or disappointed.

Because this is our grass:



Dead.
Except that for those few little guys holding on for dear life.

We haven't mowed since June, maybe. (we=D, not me.  I vowed that since I wouldn't have been able to mow the grass this summer since I was pregnant, that I was going on strike and not going to mow anyways.  I should have picked a different summer to go on strike.)

It's pathetic.

We finally got some rain last night, but not enough to fix this craziness.

It looks so ugly.

This is what it is supposed to look like.

Who wants to mow in 110 degrees anyways?
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And, because you haven't seen fatty Fergie in awhile.

Licking my schweaty knee.

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And I am trying to avoid the subject of pregnancy and babies and all of that in this post.  It is easy to let it become consuming and then I find myself getting bitter and jealous.

And I don't want to be one of those women who is bitter and jealous around other women who are pregnant or have kids.
But I can totally see how it happens.
It is so easy to just let those horrible feelings consume me.
And I hate that.

And I hate that I don't have a daughter.
And I hate that she died.
And left me.
Missing her.
While she's probably having all the fun.
And life keeps going without her.